I thought it would be fun to post my very first “worry list” and address all of my concerns that I had a year ago. I originally posted this on August 3rd, which was three days before the recruitment information session and six days before the first practice.
I’ve grouped them into some common themes: social anxiety, skill anxiety, and everything else.
No one will like me, I won’t like anyone, I’ll be too shy to talk and I won’t ever know if I would like anyone or they would like me, Anxiety will get the best of me and I will skip this Saturday’s recruitment event
So I obviously didn’t skip the recruitment event, but I was kind of right with some of my other concerns. I had 10 girls in my fresh meat group and every single one of them dropped out by December, so everyone that I started with was gone by the time the new season started. It takes a while for me to break out of my shell and I didn’t start socializing or making good friends within the team until about February/March.
I will break a bone my very first practice, I will never learn how to stop, My crossovers aren’t actually crossovers and instead are some weird mutant leg thing I made up, I won’t be able to stand still without rolling, I will never be able to get low enough, I will only be able to do 15 laps in 5 minutes, Heather and Itzel are lying when they say I’m good at skating, I will never be able to glide on my right foot for more than 5 seconds, I will be bad at everything
I am not bad at everything. I am still bad at some things (like left-footed t-stops), but everything here has been taken care of. All of these worries weren’t fixed overnight and it took a lot of hard work and determination to get where I am now. I still have things I want to be better at and I know that if I keep skating and keep working on them I will get it eventually.
My gear won’t arrive in time, My gear will be the wrong size, Work will keep me from being on time for practice so often that the team will tell me not to bother to come to training at all, The team only has room for a few skaters and I won’t make the cut
Meh, little concerns. My gear did arrive. I adjust my work schedule to fit my derby schedule (because I am a bad employee, maybe?). How wrong I was about the amount of skaters. I wish our fresh meat had that concern. Our current league worry is having enough skaters, not having too many.
I’ll die from the exercise
Legit concern. The first month was so intense I could barely move. Nine hours of off-skates practice a week really beat me down, but I’m glad I made it through. Sometimes we have super crazy endurance practices where I believe I’m going to die, but I push through it and I’m always happy I completed whatever horrible drill we did.
I will fall flat on my face while everyone is watching
Ummm, yup. Often.
I won’t like roller derby